Saturday, 16 June 2012

Sterotyping Stitchers-Blog Hop #4

Ok, Im not usually one to voice an opinion, Im usually the quiet one at the back of the room, listening and taking everything in. But when I read about stitchingthenightaway 's Blog Hop I thought it was something that I could weigh in on.

The question  asked was..
Do you experience this same assumption from society in general that just because you’re being crafty you’re also driven by some unseen force to be in constant 1950s housewife mode? and then…. Who actually does the cooking and the cleaning in the household? I’d also really like to hear some words from the men in the crowd who stitch on this topic. What sort of societal reactions do you get and what ridiculously wrong assumptions do people make towards you when they see you working on needlework?

My Answer is this:

My dear step mum bought me the joy of stitching when she joined the family when I was 7. I cant remember when i started, but I remember her happily stitching in her afternoon break. The housework, well it was just always done and I still dont know how she manages it all as she married into a family of 4 kids (Im the oldest) and she was only 27, and yet it all come so natural to her even after having 3 babies of her own.Although even now my father and brother accuse her of doing nothing and just like my Dear Husband, you dont dare let them see you with a cup of tea in hand or they think thats all youve done all day. Stitching for me early on was a stress releif after school or on weekends as I didn't go out and party or 'normal' teenager stuff.

These days, stitching is still my stress releiver. With 3 kids under 5, the house is never perfect, but what is done is done all by me. My husband leaves for work before sunup and gets home after the kids bedtime. He does mow the lawn (but that doesnt include picking up kids toys ect off the lawn beforehand, that is my job). My inlaws give off a vibe that if youre not in the workforce, youre lazy and thoughtless and as they live in the same town it can get draining. And they definatly look down at me for stitching when the house isnt sparkling 24/7 since I am home all the time.

So i think why people assume that we are the 1950s housewife is that they would assume that we only stitch after absolutly everything is done in the house. And to that I say 'piffle!' lol. Who wants to scrub windows everyday? As long as the dishes are done, everyones wearing something clean and the floor can be walked on and swept, and beds are tidy, mum can take a minute to herself, there are too many WIPs not too lol! As I told my Dear Husband the other day, I cant remember the last time I actually sat down to drink a cup of tea or coffee, I usually have a few mouthfulls and then find it a few hours later stone cold so i must be doing something right :P

So leave the duster in its holder, set the dryer instead of going out to the line and sit a little while!

Happy Stitching :D


Cathy Pavlovich said...

I actually had someone tell me that she likes to cross stitch, but doesn't do it because she feels guilty that there's something she should be doing around the house. Well, duh, there's always something to do around the house, isn't there?! We shouldn't feel guilty for taking some time for ourselves! By the way, I like your blog.

Minnie said...

Well to anyone who thinks stitching keeps me from housework, cooking and any other chore... you've got that right. When DH is on the golf course he doesn't worry about what is/isn't getting done. Neither do I.

Kaisievic said...

You are so right - why should we have to give up stitching just to keep a perfect house? I work full-time (my kids are grown upish) and so I don't have the inclination to do housework all weekend. I need my down time which is what stitching, baking, reading and blogging is all about. You tell your DILs that if they want your house to be sparkling 24/7 they are perfectly welcome to come over and do it themselves. You enjoy your kids, your DH and your craft - this is what life is about - not a perfect home all of the time!

sharine said...

Couldn't agree more. And in reality keeping a house sparkling clean with 3 kids under the age of 5(which I have as well) is just not possible!

Lindsay said...

We are all entitled to our little things we do to relax, regardless of whether the house is spotless. I never feel guilty about taking time to stitch even when there are things left to do around the house!

Kasey said...

Phyllis Diller said, "Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing." I keep this in mind ALL the time when my house is never clean enough. LOL

Regena said...

o m g, that is all so true. Apparently, all I do all day is sew and watch tv and go online. LOL who was that woman who washed down all the bathroom walls yesterday? cooks nearly every day(we have to eat leftovers once in awhile) pays the bills, shops, cleans, totes kids from here to kingdom come????? I try and sew once a week, more if I could. and yes, I could be more efficient, but if no one else cares about doing it, why should I? LOL
My home looks lived in and if I am the only one who cleans it, I can only do so much.
And yes, I sew, so I must be crafty (so not lol)
I am blessed enough to be a stay home mom so I must have tons of free time. why do people get their info? School is out and I have barely had a free minute in three weeks!! LOL

Monique said...

Oh I know how you feel and I totally agree with Regena. I am a SAHM and only have one daughter (7). I have a big house and my parents in law and hubby base my housework on his mom. Her house is perfect. You will never walk in and find anything untidy. But all she does is clean and garden. She knits only in winter at night and does not watch TV. She is the 1950s type who believes that a man does not do housework. My hubby has told me (when he's angry) that all I do is sit on my ass. But then he does sweet things like drive me around so I can get a magazine and the other night he came home with a clip on light to help me stitch. My house looks lived in because I want to enjoy my life doing things I like and nobody ever thanks you for opening a cupboard and always finding clothes in it, but will quickly let you know how unhappy they are if what they want isn't washed or ironed.

Susie said...

boy oh boy - can I agree with you on this one!! Stitching also relaxes me too.......if I don't do it at night when the kids are in bed I am cranky!!!